Dwight D. Eisenhower: Shitbird Score 60

Ethical & Moral Breakdown:
Eisenhower publicly warned of the "military-industrial complex" — after spending eight years feeding it. His presidency normalized covert regime change as a standing tool of U.S. policy. Under his direction, the CIA toppled elected governments in Iran (1953) and Guatemala (1954), installing regimes that tortured and killed with U.S. weapons, training, and funding.

In the Congo, he authorized planning for Patrice Lumumba's elimination in August 1960 (per the Church Committee); Lumumba was murdered days before Ike left office, and the Congo bled for decades. In Southeast Asia, he bankrolled French colonialism and installed the Diem regime, seeding the Vietnam War. Note on Guatemala: the coup and its early repression are charged here — the 1980s genocide those forces later committed is charged to Reagan, whose administration armed and applauded it. No double-counting.

Key Policies & Their Toll:

• CIA coup in Iran (1953) — installed the Shah; SAVAK torture state counted downstream (25%)
• CIA coup in Guatemala (1954) — Árbenz overthrown; coup and pre-1978 repression share only: ~20,000 (downstream)
• Congo — authorized Lumumba elimination planning (1960); post-independence collapse counted downstream (25%): ~25,000
• Vietnam — backed French colonialism, installed Diem; early-war seeding counted downstream (25%)
• Nuclear expansion — "massive retaliation" doctrine raised global annihilation risk

Toll Assessment:

• Avoidable Deaths: ~100,000
• Unavoidable Deaths: ~150,000

Shitbird Score Breakdown:

• Base Score (avoidable death toll): 41
• Ethics Penalty: +14 (covert coups, assassination authorization, colonial support)
• Systemic Legacy Bonus: +5
• Final Shitbird Score: 60

"Beware the military-industrial complex."
Said the man who built it and handed over the keys.